24 years ago I had my baby Alex. He was such a beautiful baby. I didn't know I could love a child so much or what it even meant to be a mother, the labor was long and hard, but the baby was perfect and sweet. I took him home with promises to have a good life. It wasn't perfect, I was young but I made promises to that child that I would be the best mother anyone ever had. I doted over him and enjoyed ever second. Alex was a very alert baby, His eyes bright, for a newborn he was very interactive, I thought that was normal. I didn't realize newborns slept alot, fed, and slept because Alex didn't. He didn't really cry much. I have been told by family members they felt cheated because I didn't show him off or pass him around, I was so into him that I spent every hour with him. Did I know? Did God give me the gift of a content alert newborn? When he was ten days old, he died in his sleep. No indication of anything not right, he was just gone, and my world crashed. My life prior to Alex was empty and my life after Alex has been built with his memory. Everything I do and the person I am is due to this perfect little baby that God called Home... Not a day goes by that I do not think of my sweet babies in Heaven and not a day goes by that I miss and long for them, but I think of their eternal life of happiness, never any sorrows, never any pain, and I pray in God's mercy one day I will be reunited with my sweet babies and will understand His will.
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